Kids. We have a lot of them in the family now that most of my siblings and cousins have married and have families of their own. In fact, come February next year I will even be officially a grandmother via my niece, who recently got married and is pregnant with their first child.
I have friends from school who have two or three kids already. Some of them have kids who are now in high school and some even have kids who are freshmen in college already. When I think about it, I know that it’s something that I want for myself as well. I want to have kids. I want to be a mother. I know that’s highly unlikely at the moment considering that I don’t even have a relationship at the moment and that I would really like to have a child after I’m married and not beforehand. I think I’ve waited long enough for the right guy for me to at least do it right, you know what I mean?
Sometimes I wonder when that will happen. Some friends have openly wondered if it will ever happen for me at all. I don’t. I believe in my heart that God would not put this longing for a family of my own in my heart if it is not part of His will for me. Who knows, I may pull a Khloe Kardashian and marry a guy I’ve only met for two weeks and then start a family. Anything can happen. With God ANYTHING is possible. He has a plan for me and I put my trust in that, even if I don’t understand it sometimes (not that I have to understand it all the time, I mean He is God after all, He knows me better than I know myself and knows what’s best). What I do know is that through the years I’ve learned about the kind of guy I would like to spend my life with and the kind of relationship I’d like to have that would be for keeps. I’m open to that in my life and I’m just waiting for God’s perfect time for it.
For now, I will just have to keep doting on the kids in my family. If how I deal with them is any indication, my kids will be spoiled rotten when I finally have them. Don’t know if that is a good or a bad thing though!
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